My Thoughts

Welcome to my blog, this is for my notes and thoughts I want to shout out into the void.


Updates on goals for this year and next

Goals for this year:

  1. quit nicotine (yeah didn’t happen, but cut down a lot)
  2. release darkwave demo (finished, but holding off on releasing)
  3. release noise demo (finished)
  4. release black metal demo (half finished, but holding off on releasing)
  5. buy a true mirrorless camera (finished)
  6. update this and switch to a full grid system (in progress)
  7. finish everything for my degree (almost done)

Goals for next year:

  1. Apply to a masters program
  2. Either run or help run an art/music venue
  3. Travel to at least one other continent
  4. Get a business off the ground
  5. Showcase photography in a gallery showing
  6. Buy at least one local property
  7. Finish the documentary
  8. Do a game or film soundtrack under my legal name
  9. Finish renovations at home
  10. Throw a graduation party
  11. Add more to this site


Some thoughts on extroverted interactions

I’ve always found myself fascinated with learning about how the world and people “work”. There’s a beauty in conversing with others in a way where they tell you their history, lives, and how they view the world themselves. As I’ve gotten older and more extroverted I’ve found that I’ve learned more from talking to people around me and learning about them and their interests than I have from any other outlet. Everyone has a particular personality that is a combination of their upbringing and the people who have influenced them throughout their lives. This factor allows for every individual’s history to be unique and irreplaceable. Two people will always have a difference of this unique history and thus allow them to learn from one another. May it be character traits, interests, or views on subjects, a person will always obtain new insight from those around them.


November update

Been awhile since I’ve included any updates on here, so here goes it. This semester has been a lot of work, juggling my house work along with school and my multiple jobs. So far looks like most of the long running obligations I’ve had throughout the prior 3 years should be coming to an end soon. With that in mind I’ve been looking for how to start moving my life towards setting up everything I need to finally start settling down. Maybe set up a garden, work on more hobbies at home, and more consistent income, etc. Feels like I'm finally getting burned out from the constant going out and time to start focusing more on myself and my interests.

Anyhow, that’s enough of a rant for now. Hope summer went well for those reading this.


Mid way through the year update on my goals for the year. So far almost finished with the darkwave and dungeon synth demos. Been cutting down on nicotine and quit drinking for the most part. Got a full frame mirrorless! Last, but not least, I have at least a year left for my degree. I'll write back in 6 months and see how it goes.


Been a minute since I've been able to update the website. Currently half way through my semester and so far anything that could go wrong has, but on a positive note it looks like I'm getting everything under control. Hopefully I'll be able to spend some more time on my hobbies during spring break and the 3 month break I should have for summer.


New Year, New Goals

Last year was a huge moving step forward for me in getting back into a groove of the things I loved doing pre-covid, plus a few more things. This year I want to expand on my photography, this site, finishing up on my degree, and release at least 2 albums.

I find these all pretty doable goals, and ultimately I want to hold myself accountable to doing them.
anyhow here’s my new years revolution list:

  • quit nicotine
  • release darkwave demo
  • release noise demo
  • release black metal demo
  • buy a true mirrorless camera
  • update and switch to a full grid system
  • finish everything for my degree

I’ll come back to this in 6 months and see where I’m at.
Thank you to everyone who has been following the site and I hope this year goes well for you.



Feels so good to be done with this semester

I feel constantly time crushed to do the things I want to do with my time, from my hobbies, to learning, to making art, it just never feels like there's enough hours in the day for me. I plan on spending the next month finishing as many of the projects running through my head as I can and optimizing my time to do so. .

Some basic tips I’ve found to help with time organizing are:
1: It's much easier to set up things to do consistently if you set up a schedule for things, you forget appointments less and it allows you to dictate a reasonable amount of time to things.
2: Spending less time online also helps in so many ways, yes I’m primarily talking about doom scrolling through social media.
3: Treating entertainment as a reward is something that we in the modern world forget sometimes, and at least for myself I find it usually was the biggest time sink of them all.

Hopefully I'll have something to post on here by the end of the month as a show of what I've accomplished during this break.


Thought I had earlier while driving at the concept of "dead chat".

I find the repetitive interactions (shitposting, idol chat, etc..) in a lot of online spaces to be detrimental to actual conversation and time usage. While I do understand the interest involved being the passing of idol time between acts with entertainment, it hinders individuals in the sense of lack of forming bonds between one another and creates a constate loop of dopamine that is just unnatural. People would find more fulfillment with actual stimulating conversation between people they care to bond with , using their time more wisely with hobbies, or learning more on topics they can apply throughout their lives.

Essentially mindless entertainment in the same sense as repetitive videogames or television.


Something I've always been very distasteful of has been how sanitized the internet has become design wise. I started using the internet towards the tail end of pre-social media, and there was something beautiful and adventurous about going down the rabbit hole of shitty html formatted sites. While these were ugly and overall cumbersome, there was a uniqueness to each site and the individual flavors of their creators really shined through with them. Around 2012 with the redesign of facebook and the push for a more uniform design for larger, more corporate, sites flooded down into smaller more nitche sites. This also coincide with the death of forums for the social circle of hobbyists and nitche topics, which then moved towards "groups" on social media sites. As time moved on building a unique site was dropped for pregenerated templates that followed formulaic minimalist design philosophies taught to most UX designers. I've grown to hate how things have become and its a shame feeling that everything revolved around a select few sites, I long for the adventurous feeling of the pre social media era.